My #1 wedding pet-peeve is when couples think they have to keep up with the big, expensive weddings their friends are having. They get engaged and are excited for about a week and then fall into despair when they look at their wedding budget. They quickly realize they can’t afford all the fancy must-haves that they have seen at their friends’ weddings. So, they do what so many other couples are doing. They push their wedding date out for two+ years – so they can save up the money to pay for their dream wedding. Stop the wedding comparison!
I wish engaged couples wouldn’t put so much financial pressure on themselves to try to keep up with their friends. It seems they think their wedding won’t be as special if they don’t have the best of everything – or at least everything their friends do.
Wedding Comparison Stems From A Deeper Issue
This type of thinking stems from a deeper issue. It comes from constantly comparing ourselves to others. Comparing ourselves to others is so much easier now because we have instant access to see into friends lives on social media. The issue is we usually only see the perfectly curated photos and posts of our friends at their best. We don’t get to see their insecurities or messy homes or when they don’t have the energy to be at their best.
All too often we grow up being so impressed with what others are doing or what they have that we don’t put as high of value on we do and have. It can even get to the point where we try to change our own personalities and what we like to try to be more like someone else or to “fit in.”
Then we find ourselves as adults wondering who we really are and trying to play catch up to find our true fearless selves. All too often, this carries over into planning our weddings.
Now, don’t get me wrong, I love gorgeous weddings with fancy things, but don’t choose them merely to impress. I feel sad inside when a couple goes into debt or saves money for years so they can spend it on their wedding. Wedding comparison puts a shadow over what should be a happy time.
Getting Married On A Budget Is A Blessing In Disguise
Getting married on a budget is a blessing in disguise. It gives you and your fiancé the chance to decide what elements are most important to you. You get to choose together what will make your wedding the most meaningful and the most memorable for you. It can even give you heartfelt moments and memories of you and your family members doing some wedding DIY together.
When your wedding day is done and you are a married couple – what will be the most important thing you carry with you from your special day? The memories. It won’t be all the decor or expensive food. It will be those special looks between you and your spouse, the tears in your loved ones eyes, the words of encouragement and well wishes from your guests. The best part of your wedding day are all the special little moments in time you choose to capture and carry with you forever. Check out this blog post about wedding traditions.
Choose Your Wedding Priorities
My now husband and I focused on family and making memories as a high priority. Decor and food was a low priority. I mean we wanted some decor and food but it didn’t have to be expensive. We had very simple table decorations and our venue provided the tables, chairs, and table cloths for the reception. They even had ceremony decorations that fit in perfectly with our theme. We chose to only have personal florals – bouquets, boutonnieres, and corsages for the wedding party and close family members. We had an evening wedding and served a buffet of simple food. It was perfect to me and I was just happy that we had food to serve our guests.
The Cure For Wedding Comparison: How To Plan A Meaningful Wedding On A Budget
- Choose your wedding priorities. Decide where you can save and where you can splurge. Check out this video from my mentor, Jamie Wolfer.
- Practice mindfulness. Focus on making memories and cherishing your relationships with your family and friends.
- Invite guests who are cheering you on.
- Stick to your budget.
- Accept help when offered. Most family members and friends view helping out as an honor.
I wish you all the best on your wedding planning journey. Please enjoy each step of the way. Happy memory making!
Let’s chat! Are you feeling overwhelmed or stuck on your wedding planning journey? Please contact me. I love to talk all things wedding!